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Seedy Hole In The Wall

Friday, August 12th

9pm til 2am





[film noir protagonist voice]
We were down on our luck like a chubby otter with a septum piercing down on his knees...
[melancholy saxophone plays]

The landlord had kicked us out of our home, so we were left with nowhere to go but the gutter. A wet, dank gutter, because it was permanently raining and always nighttime. We felt like a rat crawling through the sewers, looking for a way out. But there was no way out, and we knew it. We were trapped in this dark, dreary world, with no hope of ever tasting the sweet, salty flavor of an anonymous stranger's bodily fluids ever again.

That's when we saw her. She was like a sunny ray of sunshine in the midst of all this dark, dreary darkness. She smelled funny, and clearly had a drinking problem, but even so, she radiated hope like a radiator that had been turned up too high in the wintertime, and always seemed to leave your apartment scorching hot even when it's cold as a cold day in Hell outside.

Her name? Metairie.

We approached her like a snake snaking along the floor of a bar that hadn't been cleaned since the Carter administration, and she smiled at us.
That's when we knew we were in trouble.


Register and get your ticket at

Advance tickets are REQUIRED for this event because it's at a SECRET VENUE!

21+ (ID required)

All gender

(We are working on securing a venue that allows people 18-20, but this party has to be 21+. Sorry!)

Undercurrent is a sex-positive club for queer people from age 18 to 40.
People over 40 must be sponsored by a younger attendee.
Previous Undercurrent attendees over 40 may come back without a sponsor.


Metairie, LA

Near the Causeway

Ticket holders will be texted the address at 5PM on the party date!

Clothes check available

This is a not-for-profit party

Additional donations are appreciated and sexy!


Free condoms available

Please don't bareback unless you're on PrEP or undetectable

Get tested before and after this shit for fucksakes

we are not responsible for verifying that attendees are free of sexually transmissible infections
practice safer sex at your own risk

On the monkeypox situation:

Monkeypox has been detected in Louisiana. It has been falsely reported to be an STI, though it is actually spread by skin contact, fomites, or aerosol droplets. Because queer people are uniquely vigilant about reporting skin conditions and getting tested, most cases have been detected in the "men who have sex with men" community, though it may be spreading undetected among the general population.

Monkeypox is known for its rash and bumps, but also causes fever, chills, and aches. If you feel sick or have any kind of rash, please stay home. We will issue refunds to anyone who declines to attend due to symptoms.

We hope for vaccines to be widely available shortly before or after this event. The vaccine for monkeypox is 2 doses 4 weeks apart, but a single dose administered soon before or after potential exposure greatly reduces your risk of developing disease. As of writing, vaccines in Louisiana are only available for people known to have been exposed to monkeypox, but availability may increase rapidly.

See CrescentCare's page for the latest information on vaccines.

Your risk of being exposed to monkeypox at an event where people are in their underwear is likely higher than, for example, going to a crowded bar where people are wearing more clothes. Because we think vaccines will be widely available imminently, we feel comfortable hosting this event, but your choice to attend should be based on your own tolerance for risk.

If you attend this event and later test positive for monkeypox, please let us know, and we will encourage all ticketholders to get vaccinated, while keeping you anonymous.


Take a glowstick bracelet if you don't mind being touched without asking.

Talk to anyone wearing a glowstick hanging from their neck if you feel unsafe and we'll kick whoever fucked with you out on their ass

(See illustrations below)

Transphobia, racism, sexism, kink-shaming, body-shaming, or other such oppressive bullshit also not tolerated!


Before you grab your fellow cute attendee's junk, ask them if they're okay with it!

Asking verbally is always safest, but if you wanna do the non-verbal thing where you reach for the dick and make eye contact, at least wait for an enthusiastic nod.


On the other hand, if you see anyone wearing a glowstick on the wrist, just fuckin go to town on 'em. They're asking for it.

NO STILL MEANS NO however. People who mark themselves as a Glow Ho are inviting you to start without asking permission, but if they tell you to stop, you gotta fuckin stop.

Event Staff will be wearing glowsticks around their necks.

The neck glowstick means they're here to help you, but NOT NECESSARILY IN THAT WAY.

Look at the WRIST to determine who you can just indiscriminately play grab-ass with.

Keep touching your fellow Undercurrenters in our Facebook group!

Chat. Share memes. Ask the organizers if they need volunteers and have them say "nah we're fine" but really they're not fine they just all have anxiety and never know how to ask for help because their parents made them feel like they were burdens all the time. Make friends.

Also follow our social media shit


UNDERCURRENT is a MEMBERS-ONLY PRIVATE EVENT and is not open to the public.

It is open only to members of Dumb Twinks United Local 42069, a radical labor union of dumb twinks banding together to demand rights for bottoms. We are legally required to tell you that this is a joke, and we are actually a social club, not a labor union of dumb twinks.

You can become a member at the door. Membership is also open to dumb bears, dumb otters, or dumbasses of any body type. Smart gays can fuck off.

Your optional donation is to recoup expenses for renting our space and running events. It is not payment for or a guarantee of sexual activity. We reserve the right to refuse entry and membership to anyone.